You have just played BUTTON ROULETTE, by Lana Polansky. \n\nAll bad art drawn [[here.|]] \n\n"Social Media Strategy" from [[here.|]] \n\nThanks to: \n\n[[Leon Arnott|]]\n[[Porpentine|]]\n[[Kim Moss|]]\n[[David S. Gallant|]]\n[[|]]\n[[Glorious Trainwrecks|]] \n\nfor help and macro resources. \n\n[[{Back}|Start 2]]
(function(){var r="";var s=Wikifier.formatters;for(var j=0;j<s.length;j++){if(s[j].name=="image"){r=s[j].lookahead;\nbreak;}}var div=document.getElementById("storeArea").firstChild.nextSibling;while(div){if(r){k(new RegExp(r,"mg"),4);\n}var b=String.fromCharCode(92);var u=b+"s*['"+'"]?([^"'+"']+(jpe?g|a?png|gif|bmp))['"+'"]?'+b+"s*";\nk(new RegExp("url"+b+"("+u+b+")","mig"),1);k(new RegExp("src"+b+"s*="+u,"mig"),1);\ndiv=div.nextSibling;}function k(c,e){do{var d=c.exec(div.innerHTML);if(d){var i=new Image();\ni.src=d[e];}}while(d);}}());
(function () {\n version.extensions['soundMacros'] = {\n major: 1,\n minor: 1,\n revision: 1\n };\n var p = macros['playsound'] = {\n soundtracks: {},\n handler: function (a, b, c, d) {\n var loop = function (m) {\n if (m.loop == undefined) {\n m.loopfn = function () {\n;\n };\n m.addEventListener('ended', m.loopfn, 0);\n } else m.loop = true;\n;\n };\n var s = eval(d.fullArgs());\n if (s) {\n s = s.toString();\n var m = this.soundtracks[s.slice(0, s.lastIndexOf("."))];\n if (m) {\n if (b == "playsound") {\n;\n } else if (b == "loopsound") {\n loop(m);\n } else if (b == "pausesound") {\n m.pause();\n } else if (b == "unloopsound") {\n if (m.loop != undefined) {\n m.loop = false;\n } else if (m.loopfn) {\n m.removeEventListener('ended', m.loopfn);\n delete m.loopfn;\n }\n } else if (b == "stopsound") {\n m.pause();\n m.currentTime = 0;\n } else if (b == "fadeoutsound" || b == "fadeinsound") {\n if (m.interval) clearInterval(m.interval);\n if (b == "fadeinsound") {\n if (m.currentTime>0) return;\n m.volume = 0;\n loop(m);\n } else {\n if (!m.currentTime) return;\n;\n }\n var v = m.volume;\n m.interval = setInterval(function () {\n v = Math.min(1, Math.max(0, v + 0.005 * (b == "fadeinsound" ? 1 : -1)));\n m.volume = Math.easeInOut(v);\n if (v == 0 || v == 1) clearInterval(m.interval);\n if (v == 0) {\n m.pause();\n m.currentTime = 0;\n m.volume = 1;\n }\n }, 10);\n }\n }\n }\n }\n }\n macros['fadeinsound'] = p;\n macros['fadeoutsound'] = p;\n macros['unloopsound'] = p;\n macros['loopsound'] = p;\n macros['pausesound'] = p;\n macros['stopsound'] = p;\n macros['stopallsound'] = {\n handler: function () {\n var s = macros.playsound.soundtracks;\n for (var j in s) {\n var i = s[j];\n i.pause();\n i.currentTime = 0;\n }\n }\n }\n var div = $("storeArea").firstChild;\n var fe = ["ogg", "mp3", "wav", "webm"];\n while (div) {\n var b = String.fromCharCode(92);\n var q = '"';\n var re = "['" + q + "]([^" + q + "']*?)" + b + ".(ogg|mp3|wav|webm)['" + q + "]";\n k(new RegExp(re, "gi"));\n div = div.nextSibling;\n }\n\n function k(c, e) {\n do {\n d = c.exec(div.innerHTML);\n if (d) {\n var a = new Audio();\n if (a.canPlayType) {\n for (var i = -1; i < fe.length; i += 1) {\n if (i >= 0) d[2] = fe[i];\n if (a.canPlayType("audio/" + d[2])) break;\n }\n if (i < fe.length) {\n a.setAttribute("src", d[1] + "." + d[2]);\n a.interval = null;\n macros.playsound.soundtracks[d[1]] = a;\n } else console.log("Browser can't play '" + d[1] + "'");\n }\n }\n } while (d);\n }\n}());
Now everyone has infinite jury duty. \n\n<html><IMG SRC=></html>\n\nYou know the movie 12 Angry Men? \n\nNo? \n\nWell you'll never get a chance to see it, because you'll be serving jury duty forever.\n\n[[Try again.|Start 2]]
version.extensions.timedgotoMacro={major:1,minor:1,revision:0};macros["goto"]=macros["timedgoto"]={timer:null,handler:function(a,b,c,d){\nfunction cssTimeUnit(s){if(typeof s=="string"){if(s.slice(-2).toLowerCase()=="ms"){return Number(s.slice(0,-2))||0;\n}else{if(s.slice(-1).toLowerCase()=="s"){return Number(s.slice(0,-1))*1000||0;}}}throwError(a,s+" isn't a CSS time unit");\nreturn 0;}var t,d,m,s;t=c[c.length-1];d=d.fullArgs();m=0;if(b!="goto"){d=d.slice(0,d.lastIndexOf(t));\nm=cssTimeUnit(t);}d=eval(Wikifier.parse(d));if(d+""){if(this.timer){clearTimeout(this.timer);\n}s=state.history[0].passage.title;this.timer=setTimeout(function(){if(state.history[0].passage.title==s){state.display(d,a);\n}},m);}}};
The world is destroyed by a tiny penisy space laser. \n\n<html><IMG SRC=></html>\n\nIt's not the size of the spacecraft it's the motion of the... \n\nYeah. Whatever. \n\n[[Try again.|Start 2]]
When you press the button, burger eats you!\n\n<html><IMG SRC=></html>\n\nIt's funny because you're dead.\n\n[[Try again.|Start 2]]
<html>   Don't push the button.</html>\n\n<<randomp 10 "[img[][Jizzpants Heartbreak]" 10 "[img[][Bummerhazard]" 10 "[img[ht//][Fart Vengeance]" 10 "[img[][Atomic by Blondie]" 10 "[img[][Killer Bees]" 10 "[img[][Infinite Jury Duty]" 10 "[img[][Penisy Space Laser]" 10 "[img[http:/][Michael Bay Forever]" 10 "[img[][Burger Eats You]" 999 "[img[][Men with Sticks]">>\n\n<<timedgoto "Success Doggy" 15s>>\n
try { macros['randomp'] = { \n\n handler: function(place,macroName,params,parser) {\n var state = 0;\n var passageflag = false;\n var chance = 100;\n var r = Math.random() * 100;\n \n for(var i = 0; i < params.length; i++) {\n switch(state) {\n case 0:\n if(params[i] == 'passage') {\n passageflag = true;\n state = 1;\n break;\n }\n //No break !!! fall through if keyword 'passage' is not used\n \n case 1:\n chance -= params[i];\n state = 2;\n break;\n \n case 2:\n if(r >= chance) {\n if(passageflag) macros.display.handler(place,macroName,[ params[i] ]); \n else new Wikifier(place, params[i]);\n return;\n }\n state = 0;\n break;\n }\n }\n },\n\n init: function() { }\n \n};} catch(e) { \n throwError(place,"Macro Randomp Error: "+e.message); \n}
<html>   Don't push the button.</html>\n\n<<randomp 10 "[img[][Jizzpants Heartbreak]" 10 "[img[][Bummerhazard]" 10 "[img[ht//][Fart Vengeance]" 10 "[img[][Atomic by Blondie]" 10 "[img[][Killer Bees]" 10 "[img[][Infinite Jury Duty]" 10 "[img[][Penisy Space Laser]" 10 "[img[http:/][Michael Bay Forever]" 10 "[img[][Burger Eats You]" 999 "[img[][Men with Sticks]">>\n\n\n<<timedgoto "Success Doggy" 15s>>
World is destroyed by 1979 club hit Atomic by Blondie. \n\n<html><IMG SRC=></html>\n\nGood job, you magnificent shit. \n\n[[Try again.|Start 2]] \n\n<<playsound "11 Atomic.mp3", "11_Atomic.ogg" >>
Everyone gets contagiously bummed out and dies. \n\n<html><IMG SRC=></html>\n\nYou're a real putz. \n\n[[Try again.|Start 2]]
Every movie is a Michael Bay movie.\n\n<html><IMG SRC=></html>\n\nKiller bees would be better than this. \n\n[[Try again.|Start 2]]
Everyone is eaten alive by killer bees.\n\n<html><IMG SRC=></html>\n\nNot so funny when it happens in real life, is it, smartass? \n\n[[Try again.|Start 2]]
<<silently>><<display "randomp">><<endsilently>>\nYou jizz your pants by accident on your next date and are left heartbroken. \n\n<html><IMG SRC=></html>\n\nIt's like no one really "gets," you. \n\nYou fucking prize. \n\n[[Try again.|Start 2]]
Everyone's farts come alive and get revenge. \n\n<html><IMG SRC=></html>\n\nIs this what you wanted? Huh? Fart vengeance? \n\n[[Try again.|Start 2]]
Good, you can follow simple instructions! \n\n<html><IMG SRC=></html>\n\nHere is your success doggy. \n\nYou're #1. \n\n[[Credits.|Credits]]\n
Businessmen with hockey sticks become president of everything. \n\n<html><IMG SRC=></html>\n\nTheir reign is bloody and their social media strategy aims to provide brand ambassadors with compelling conversation hooks to enter into communities and fuel advocacy. \n\nLiteral hooks. \n\nEvery decision you make is an abomination. \n\n[[Try again.|Start 2]]
\n#sidebar #title {display: none; !important}\n\n#sidebar #title:hover {display:none; !important}\n\n#sidebar #title {display: none; !important}\n\n#sidebar li{ display: none; !important}\n\n#snapback {display: none; !important}\n\n#credits {display: none !important} \n\n#passages {font-family: 'Pacifico';font-size: 250%; border-left: 0px; margin: auto; width: 50%; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=thebutton] {background-color: #0000FF; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=infinitebay] {background-color: #000000; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=jury] {background-color: #CC0000; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=jizzy] {background-color: #49E20E; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=burger] {background-color: #FFFF00; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=hockey] {background-color: #551A8B; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=fart] {background-color: #FF0066; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=bees] {background-color: #00FFFF; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=atomic] {background-color: #000000; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=dicks] {background-color: #000000; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=bummer] {background-color: #00FF00; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=yay] {background-color: #FFFFFF; !important}\n\nbody[data-tags~=credits] {background-color: #FFA500; !important}\n\n.passage[data-tags~=yay] {color: #FF00CC; !important}\n\n.passage[data-tags~=thebutton] {color: #FFFF00; !important}\n\n.passage[data-tags~=jury] {color: #000080; !important}\n\n.passage[data-tags~=jizzy] {color: #FF00CC; !important}\n\n.passage[data-tags~=burger] {color: #FF0000; !important}\n\n.passage[data-tags~=hockey] {color: #FF8C00; !important}\n\n.passage[data-tags~=fart] {color: #FFFFFF; !important}\n\n.passage[data-tags~=bees] {color: #FF0000; !important}\n\n.passage[data-tags~=bummer] {color: #FF00FF; !important}\n\n.passage[data-tags~=credits] {color: #0000A0; !important}\n\n@font-face {\n font-family: 'Pacifico';\n src: url('Pacifico.ttf');\n font-weight: normal;\n}\n font-style: normal;
(function(){ var render2 = Passage.prototype.render; Passage.prototype.render = function () { var b =; var t = this.tags.join(" "); document.body.setAttribute("data-tags", t); b.setAttribute("data-tags",t); return b; }; if(state) { var tgs = state.history[0].passage.tags.join(" "); var fc = $('passages').firstChild; fc.setAttribute("data-tags",tgs); }}()); if(state) (function(){ var it = setInterval(function(){ var fd = $('passages').firstChild; if (fd!=fc) { clearInterval(it); fd.setAttribute("data-tags",tgs); } },0); }());\n\n