Sugarcane

[[{THUSDAY}|cum]]

You've erased parts of your writings so no one would take offense. Or because you liked someone too much.\n\nYou can't like someone too much but that's probably a lie.\n\n[[{*}]]

Dreaming about him every morning. Dare not to get up out of bed. Don't know if some dreams are for real. Dreaming again and. Just to make sure you feel something.\n\nYou want to be beautiful but you just feel [[disgusting|thusday]].

»The obvious. What's not needed saying. e.g. I love you; you dream of falling; I miss you. [[Weighted by metaphors.|metaphors]] Metaphors often truisms themselves. e.g. the future; the sky; I love you.«

The sea is white.\n\nYou had forgotten the sea freezes in winter.\n\n[[You walk out on an island.|friday2]]

You're sitting there watching the sea. It's so large. There's room for all the thoughts there.\n\n[[You walk over to the next island.|friday3]]

Rocks that rose from out of the ice.\n\nAnd where the water melted, a swan.\n\n[[You walk over to the next island.|friday4]]

You just want to walk right out into the water, you say.\n \n<html>A dream.</html>\n[[A memory.|ingredients again]]

into the water, by\nkristoffer zetterberg\n\nthanks go to [[porpentine|http://www.aliendovecote.com]], whose twine resources made this possible,\nhanna f for the inspiration,\nmalin for helping me with the translation\nand thee of sees, for the music

You're leaving tomorrow.\n\nYou don't know what will happen yet. You thought you had everything settled but now, when you are soon to be leaving, nothing seems to be.\n\nThat you feel confused is a good sign. Or is it lost you feel.\n\nThat you feel lost is a good sign. Then you know it means [[something|monday]].

Tomorrow you will go to the sea and there will be stone slabs there, you're sure of it and there's probably brackish water, sand and pine trees that grow low at the edges, don't want to fall.\n\nYou look forward to it looks like bays, though small, in the stones, but it ripples inward and upward. Sometimes at your feet, hands. It is freezing cold, it will be.\n\n[[Go to bed naked.|friday]]\n\n[[Go to bed as usual.|morning]]

You're leaving tomorrow.\n\nYou don't know what will happen yet. You thought you had it all figured out but now when you soon have left nothing seems to be.\n\nThat you feel confused is a good sign. Or is it lost you feel.\n\nThat you feel lost is a good sign. Then you know it means something or...\n\n[[I just want to walk right out into the water, he says.|End]]

It's not the details really, it is something else. There are so many things that\n\nThat they managed to find you along the way. Your cell phone was dead. He cranked down the window and shouted but you couldn't hear him because of all the cars. You waved at each other and you ran across the road, it has to do with that, you almost get run over several times.\n\nYou go to the [[sea|sunday]]. Lucky enough [[she's|pub]] the one driving you think because you don't trust anyone else like her. You trust him, of course, but it's different, it has to do with time and it has to do with that you can't trust\n<html>the forest you ran into and perhaps you shouldn't have come back.</html> [[The sea again|thursday again]], but it's not the same. There are no copies but probably circles in the sand and it has to do with that too, and the salt and the snow. What they have in common. And it has to do with you, naturally.

[[{THURSDAY}|tomorrow]]

but tomorrow you're going to sea again\n\nYou want it to be like when you went there before but you're not going with them now. It has to be different sometimes everything can't be copies can't always remind you of something. You're thirsty.\n\n[[Have a truism.|truism]]\n\n[[Have a pleonasm.|pleonasm]]\n\n

[[{SUNDAY}|sea]]

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You know that you once loved someone but you no longer remember how it was. Maybe it is like waking up in the morning to dance through the apartment.\n\nYou wrote a poem once. Can't remember it but it doesn't matter, it was a poem.\n\nThis Friday, you're leaving. The future is like a memory now.\n\nUndetermined events. Not that they haven't occurred yet, but because they have and you've started to [[forget|thursday]].

<<set $boxes = "yes">>But they can't be [[destroyed|game]].

Cum on your hands. Lying there for hours and all you can think of is\n\n[[Get out of bed.|ingredients]]

»The redundant. Everything that is the same. e.g. I love you; I hate you. Frequently used in American productions of the larger scale. Choruses. Used to prevent misunderstandings. Everyone gets to hear the same thing multiple times. [[Security measures.|the night before]]«

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[[{MONDAY}|schedule]]

You checked your schedule. You haven't said anything yet but you will, tomorrow.\n\nYou're longing to go. Can hardly think about anything else. You start thinking about sending her a message and ask if it really.\n\nThere are things you can't [[let go of|schedule2]].

You're freezing and regret that you declined when she asked if you wanted to borrow gloves. \n\nYou're sitting on the rocks by the water and the dogs run away. She lets them. Only calls out when a car arrives.\n\nShe takes a picture of you and a few months later, he says that it looks like a collage. It looks a little pasted and [[fake|sea4]].

You're sitting on the rocks by the water and the dogs run away. She lets them. Only calls out when a car arrives.\n\nShe takes a picture of you and a few months later, he says that it looks like a collage. It looks a little pasted and [[fake|sea4]].

You go to the sea. \n\nI just want to walk right out into the water, he says.\n\nYou write it down and he asks why none of you feel whole when you don't write. You don't understand why he says that. It's not true.\n\nYou won't go down to the water to feel it as you will eat later and there are no sinks by the sea.\n\nIt smells good and the dogs are running in the sand.\n\nA few months later you will say that it was a magical day. But you don't remember everything. You remember...\n\n[[the lovely message in the bottle you found and sent out into the water again so that someone else could read the girl's words too.|sea2]]\n\n[[the gnomes, almost covered by moss and grass.|sea2]]\n\n[[the coffee and cookies you brought to the picnic.|sea3]]

[[{FRIDAY}|friday1]]

You're sitting at a pub speaking in metaphors. It's just metaphors that works when it comes to emotions, you say and lie. It sounds like poetry and that's how you want it to sound like.\n\nShe gets up, to order a beer. She asks if you also want one. \n\n[[You answer.|morning]]

You walk out into the woods. The dogs run away. You're going farther and farther into the woods and starts to cry out to them but only one comes back.\n\n[[Then you think the other one is you.|morning]]

This is a game. It says so in the instruction manual. You refuse to throw it away because then you might happen to throw away something else at the same time. It's easy to forget things in manuals. Your notes. Your little notes.\n\nIn the attic there is piles of boxes and they are all empty. The content stands on the shelves but you can't toss the boxes. In some ways it's the boxes that are on the shelves.\n\nYou don't know what to do with them.\n \n[[Ignore them.|ignore]]\n\n[[Destroy them.|destroy]]\n\n<<if $boxes eq "yes" and $memory eq "yes">>[[Switch their places.|again]]<<endif>>

into the water

<html>It's not the details really, it is something else. There are so many things that</html> <html>That they managed to find you along the way. Your cell phone was dead. He cranked down the window and shouted but you couldn't hear him because of all the cars. You waved at each other and you ran across the road, it has to do with that, you almost get run over several times.</html> <html>You go to the sea. Lucky enough she's the one driving you think because you don't trust anyone else like her. You trust him, of course, but it's different, it has to do with time and it has to do with that you can't trust</html> <html>the forest you ran into and perhaps you shouldn't have come back.</html> <html>The sea again, but it's not the same. There are no copies but probably circles in the sand and it has to do with that too, and the salt and the snow. What they have in common.</html> And it has to do with [[you|game]], naturally.

[[{THURSDAY}|the sea again]]

<<silently>>\n<<set $memory = "no">>\n<<set $boxes = "no">>\n<<endsilently>>You look it up in the encyclopedia. \n\n»Reminiscent of dreams. Light, sparkles, or sun rays, but fuzzy. Yellow, with faint lines of orange. Squinting. A forest glade. Arises in the absence of other people. Characterized by time. Derived from one, disappears at another. Recurring.«\n\n[[{*}|wednesday]]

This Friday, you're leaving.\n\nYou have huge expectations, so large that they are more like dreams.\n\nThey have become so big and now they are abstract and hardly possible to relate to anymore.\n\nBlurred, and as dreams you forget them over time. The details. It's just the [[grand]] stories that remain.

The feeling of waking up in another bed and not knowing if it's the same house you fell asleep in. As if the dream had interfered. With different pictures and waking up again and again and every time it's different. Everything reminds you of something but you don't know what and are afraid of the answer.\n\n[[{*}|ingredients]]

<<set $memory = "yes">>But you can't [[ignore|game]] them.

kristoffer zetterberg

All of this could be seen as tiny little metaphors. Kind of like reality. If you print all of the pages, you can cut out and bathe in the words.\n\nAnd you can pick yourself up out of the tub and perhaps see your reflection. Or reflections of the past. Because everything is real, really.\n\n<<replace "Drink until drunk.">>[[Sleep.|morning]]<<endreplace>>\n